Not for one second do I think I have this parenting gig nailed. I am constantly reading, learning, gathering information to try and make me a better parent.
There are things our parents did that Husband and I were keen to emulate, and things that we are not. In addition, I think my years in teaching taught me a few things as well. One of the parenting things I feel passionate about is that I want my offspring to have a calm start to the day.
Over the years in the classroom I saw students who could clearly compartmentalise really well. That is, it didn't matter what had happened at home that morning, once they were in the classroom they had their game-face on and were ready to learn. Or if not learn, they were all set up and ready to text their mate across the classroom.
But there were many students who weren't. There were lots of students whose school day was ruined by the chaos that started their day. This could range from not having the right books for class through to the discovery that their lunchbox was empty. This may not seem like a big deal to an adult, but trust me, to a child, particularly a small child, it can be devastating. They simply don't have the skills to resolve this kind of situation themselves so whilst their meltdowns may seem disproportionate to the event itself, in their small world, it's very upsetting.
This year has seen some big changes for us. With two children now in school full time it has meant making sure two sets of everything is ready for school. In theory that shouldn't be too hard. The reality was somewhat different. Coupled with that, I try hard to hide my helicopter instincts and want to encourage a semblance of independence in my children.
So mid-way through last term morning time became more like a crisis management situation. The day I had to belt home and get the correct uniforms for my children was the final straw. I hadn't checked their bags the day before and hadn't known they needed them.
I have a child prone to anxiety, and yes I admit, I have the "must get it right at all times" gene too. This means when I fail at perfection, I need a brown paper bag stat.
Following "the crisis," that night Husband and I sat down with the offspring, and together we brainstormed what things needed to be done in the morning and what needed to be done in the afternoon. In addition we instituted a new and exciting policy that Mr Large had to serve up breakfast. (Thank you for that suggestion anidledad) None of what I am saying is rocket science. But the results were great. The list was duly typed up and put on the fridge. The kids loved being able to check off each task and to have the knowledge that it was there in black and white exactly what they needed to do. They filled in the list every single day for last term.
Today is the start of a new term and a new list:


The list meant this morning the day began well. It was calm. It was orderly. Apart from the kittens crying pitifully as we locked the door on them.
I loved the fact I wasn't hoarse by the time I got out the front door from shrieking instructions and chasing them all over the house.
And most importantly, to my mind, they feel in charge of themselves. They feel they have achieved something concrete and tangible, which is what I like to feel too.
And their day begins well. I can't promise them a wonderful day at school but by doing this I am making sure they go to school feeling organised and calm.
Which is a pretty good place to start.