Coach’s daughter (whose name I cannot remember) was dating this really pansy guy who was a mime. He was so pansy. He wore, I think, a helmet whenever he went out running because he was afraid of getting hurt. Also, I think he got nose bleeds all the time and Coach’s daughter would always dote over him and make sure he was okay and be hell of worried about his nose. But worst of all, from Coach’s point of view, he was a mime. Clearly if you are the head football coach at a Big-10 (I think it was the Big-10 or at least some fictional equivalent of the Big-10) college you do not want your daughter dating some pansy, nose-bleeding, effeminate mime. Also, the mime’s name was, I’m pretty sure, Stuart. Not only did the writers take the time to make him a weakly feeble mime, they also gave him a name that they knew football coaches the world over would detest; no one who is a football coach likes a guy named Stuart.

So much hilarity ensued when Stuart tried to show Coach how good he was for Coach’s daughter, and how strong he really could be. It was sort of tragic though, because he always failed, no matter how hard he tried.

Even though it was technically tragic I do not think it was sad, however. That guy was a real douche bag.